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Q 3 ) What is the “me” that I refer to?

 


 Q 3 ) What is the “me” that I refer to?



The “me” in us, in ordinary material understanding, generally refers to the body, mind, or intellect. Most people identify themselves with the body. The body has a name — for example, my name is “Nipun Ahuja.” When we call someone, we call their body. When we feel something or get an idea, we say, “I got this feeling” or “I got this idea.” We do not say, “The mind felt this” or “The intellect produced this thought.” We say, “My feeling” or “My thought.”

However, the scriptures deny the identification of the Self with the body, mind, or intellect. When one becomes disidentified from the physical body, the mental processes, and the intellect, the “I” begins to recognize itself in its own light. This is the real “me” — awareness that is independent of what we call physical, mental, or intellectual layers.

The “I” has a strong tendency to depend on something outside itself. It struggles to remain as it is without proper training or sadhana, which may include self-inquiry, reflection, discussion with realized souls, and study of scriptures.

In daily language, we often say:

       “I am tired.”

       “I am confused.”

       “I am an engineer.”

       “I am a son or husband.”

       “I am a businessman.”

If we observe carefully, we notice that the “I” remains constant in these statements, while the context keeps changing. Sometimes “I” refers to the body, sometimes to thoughts, sometimes to a social identity, and sometimes to a role.

In psychology, it is suggested that the “I” living in a particular moment is not exactly the same as the “I” narrating that moment later. The one experiencing the moment is simple awareness, while the one explaining or narrating it is the brain constructing a story.

If we deeply observe the “me,” we encounter thoughts, memories, expectations about the future, emotions, and perceptions. These form what can be called the psychological self. But the real “I” is different. It is the awareness because of which the psychological self appears and functions.

The real “I” is pure awareness. The “me” we commonly know is not fixed or solid; it is constantly changing. It is a pattern within the system. But the deeper “I” is the underlying principle due to which all experiences occur. Even fundamental processes such as sunrise and sunset, birth and death, growth, sleep, dreaming, and waking are known only because of awareness. All objects — tables, chairs, rocks, books, cars, homes — are meaningful only because they are known in awareness.

At present, we are strongly connected to our memories and future expectations. But the real “me” is distinct from these. It is the substratum of all experience.

An analogy can be drawn with electricity. Electricity allows different appliances — bulbs, fans, televisions, computers — to function. Similarly, awareness allows the body-mind system to function. Our system receives input through seeing, hearing, touching, smelling, and tasting. These inputs become outputs in the form of thoughts, emotions, perceptions, and ideas. We usually identify this entire process as “me.” But upon deeper observation, we see that all these processes are dependent on time and space. Awareness itself is not experienced as bound by time and space in the same way.

Because of patterns within the system, life appears predictable to some extent. However, awareness itself is not limited by those patterns. One way to recognize the deeper “me” is by loosening or disturbing rigid psychological patterns. As long as we remain completely identified with habitual patterns, we remain bound to the constructed self.

Most people see themselves as constrained by time, space, and biological processes. But sages suggest that the real “I” is not confined to these limitations. We fail to recognize this freedom because of strong identification with memory and expectation.

In summary, the “me” we commonly believe ourselves to be and the “me” we truly are are two different aspects. Shifting from the constructed self to the deeper awareness requires sincere inquiry and disciplined practice.





Further discussion between Abhey and Nipun

Date 1st March 2026

Abhey reply

Subtly important to note is that it is not yet proven that:

          Awareness exists independent of brain.

          Awareness is metaphysically eternal.

So instead of calling the real “me” as awareness, I could say -

Consciousness is the self-reflective movement of Awareness through which Awareness appears as experience.

 

Because we need to understand that awareness isn’t considered an entity on its own.

In all of the questions, the seeker must come to understand that assumptions needn’t become a necessity in any explanation of awareness.

Think,

          Is awareness known apart from experience?

          Or is awareness inseparable from experience itself

 

So if I don’t exist, will awareness remain?

If you say yes, then for whom?

 

That’s the catch.

Awareness is always taken to be inseparable from the consciousness in question

 

Date: 3rd March, 2026

Nipun reply

Hariom 🙏
Thanks for the reply, Abhey Ji. I understand what you are saying. You have beautifully said that it is not yet scientifically proven that awareness exists without the brain, and we also don’t know yet whether it exists at every moment. And we should try to be careful not to assume things on our own.

For me, I am trying to get into my direct experience and don’t want to prove whether awareness exists separately from the brain.

In my daily life, I understand theoretically and practically that thoughts change, feelings change, and body sensations change. Something is there in me and in all of us which knows these changes. I call that “awareness,” just as a simple word. I am not exactly trying to say it is an independent object or some eternal thing. I am just pointing to the fact that knowing is happening inside me.

You asked: Is awareness known apart from experience?

But I completely accept that for me, awareness and experience both seem connected. I never see awareness separately like an object and truly accept that it is next to impossible.

You also asked: If I don’t exist, will awareness remain? And for whom?

Honestly, I don’t know about that. I don’t want to try to imagine what happens if “I” am not there because that is too difficult for me. What I am observing is that right now, experience is happening and it is known. That is all I can say from my side right now.

So I am trying not to make any big assumptions. Previously, I was trying to answer your questions in an abstract way, but now I am shifting the answer descriptions to what I notice in simple daily experience.

I am seeing the process of answering your questions as a seed for my self-transformation. Yet I don’t know where it would lead me. 😊

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